FML

More than a year ago, I asked my mom for something that I was totally in love with and her answer was 'after you graduate from college'. That was the deal. Yes, I remember that very well.

A week prior to this week, she has told me about some photography workshop that her friend was organizing and I was just 'uh-huh. Uhmmkay' because that's all I can say. So I sorta told my best friend about it cause I was 'a bit' interested (she wasn't), but I just let it pass that I almost forgot about it. So the week went on.... until this morning,

Mama: La, apil atong photography workshop ba kay P1000 lang this 20(ish), 3days lang! (So she was telling me to join this workshop at a cheap price for 3days)

Lala: Naa ko'y cam? Unsaon nako pag-apply sa akong mga natun-an? Palitan ko nimo? (And I was asking her if I have a camera to be used during the workshop to apply what I've learned and if she'd buy me one)

Mama: Dili man na kelangan oy, basics lang man! (Telling me that it's not necessary because they'll only teach us the basics on photography)

Lala: Diba ana man ka palitan ko nimo pag graduate nako? (Asking my mother about her promise that she'd be buying me one when I graduate)

Mama: ............ (she was speechless)

See? How could she convince me to join some photography workshop when I don't even have/own an instrument to be used mainly during that period of time?

I am being pathetic again. How could life get so cruel and not let me get what I want? :|

Rant.

I just got my grade in Philosophy of Religion, 65. How great was that? Should I be grateful to my teacher about this? This is the lowest among all the grades that I've gotten in my entire life. I AM FCKING PROUD OF IT. Bullshit

I'm so pissed off. Fcking pissed off.

Lazy Sunday

It's Monday though, but I am thinking about yesterday's cra...laziness, so yea, a Lazy Sunday it was.


The family went to church to hear mass yesterday, but not together. Father went at 7:30am, Mom and my siblings went at 9am, while I went there at 4:30pm. And I was alone. Ok, so I could have gone together with them but I was too lazy to get up that I even pretended to read my book in philosophy. But I got back to sleep anyway, felt a lot better. I just told my mom that I'd be hearing mass this afternoon so she wouldn't get angry. The last time I went to mass before yesterday was around 5 weeks ago, Easter.


It was quite a nice experience though, I've gone to church alone before (my first time was during my 18th birthday), but yesterday was something that I'd not want to forget. When I got there, the mass has already started. Actually, it was about to end so I waited for the next ( the last) mass for the day which started at 5:15. Before it started, I just sat at my place and talked to myself. Ok, I was talking to God, telling Him I haven't been doing it for quite a while now. I felt guilty. :| For a few moments of thinking and over thinking, I noticed that it wasn't only me who was there to hear mass alone, we were quite plenty actually which made me think that I should be doing it more often.


Being alone yesterday made me feel independent and calm and free. It's as if I am living alone and had to do things alone. It was a nice feeling because I got to notice almost everything around me. And of course, I spent a few moments alone with God.
All of these happened because of my lazy ass.


I just realized that my eyes couldn't see clearly anymore (about a few meters away). OK I realized this for some time now. But I kept on insisting that I'm fine with it. No hassle for my parents ;)


And, I haven't shampooed in two or three days now, but I did take a bath yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that, and the.... annoying. I feel so disgusting. Nah, nobody smells my hair anyway. :)


Oh, and it has been weeks since the last time I shaved my legs. How disgusting could I get?


And yes, I was looking at my unshampooed hair just this morning and noticed my virgin hair! It has grown to an inch already! I felt so happy! But it's not gonna stay virgin for long because I am planning to murder it again with some cheap hair color/dye. I've done it twice for this year (wine red and some copper-brown-red yada-yada color). It's not gonna get any uglier anyway cause it's in its ugliest state. I wouldn't care if I'd get bald for it. Kidding!


Today's a HOLIDAY! A day to celebrate Labor day (moved from Saturday to Monday), no classes. NO ALLOWANCE FOR TODAY.


Start the week right! Enjoy! ;)

yes, You've Caught My Attention

Last night as I was wasting my time doing nothing in the internet, I came across the Yahoo Philippines' homepage right after signing out from my mail. So what appears on its homepage? They have their  headlines for today, a column for favorites, more news, some advertisements and some other stuff. But what caught my attention the most was their popular searches at the upper-right part of the page.

That thing in red caught my attention the most, the word 'Jejemon'. Yesterday, it was at the top 2 of their popular searches, but now it descended to the third place. And unsurprisingly, it is also included in their headline news (if that's what it's called) for today.

And because curiosity has taken over me, I clicked on the link: Are you a 'Jejemon'? http://ph.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100422210823AAsB68w

Now, if you try to click on it, it will give you a wider knowledge about this thing that they call JEJEMONS.

I don't really care if this group of persons doing this way of typing an sms (or whatever that there is to type) will continue to annoy me forever. What has become more annoying for me these past few days are the people who condemn these jejemons. They've made a fan page against jejemons, post bad things about them, and condemn them as if they aren't human beings who know how to read and write. And it's as if these anti-jejemons haven't experienced typing that way (or if not, as if they don't have friends who do it that way) or just whatever. Why can't they just go on with their lives and leave those people-who-type-as-if-they-know-nothing-about-correct-spelling alone? These anti-jejemons are acting as if they're superior from these jejemons and as if they know the correct spelling of all the fvcking words in the English Dictionary!

They piss me off more than these jejemons, I'm sorry to say that. Of course, I do get annoyed reading stuff especially text messages typed the way they do because it's just inappropriate and really very annoying. Sometimes that is the reason why I don't get to read the whole message if it's typed that way and yeah, I do spell the words correctly (I bet) in my text messages (yes, no shortcuts for me) because some people get the wrong idea with misspelled words, just like me. But why condemn these people to death? It just ain't right. OK, enough about it.

*Fvck summer classes! You're ruining my vacation!

Here I go again, doing what I do best - RANTING.

Have a lovely weekend, everyone! :D

What About Death?

click photo source

I've often dreamt about death, a friend's death, my parents', siblings', and of course, my death. And whenever I wake up from these dreams, I always find myself crying in bed. Sad because it seem so real while I was sleeping and at the same time, happy because God has given me another day to live. After wiping my tears off, I get up and check my family if they're still breathing.


The truth is, I've always been thinking about my death. What could happen next the moment I die? Will I become like those ghosts who show themselves to different persons? Or will I go to heaven? Will it be peaceful? I've got a lot of questions to ask about death yet no one could really answer them for me because I cannot just talk to a dead person or a ghost and yea, it would scare me to death, so I wouldn't bother. And I'm not yet ready to die. I've never thought of suicide or putting an end to my life. I'm too afraid to do it myself, and there's no backing out in death.


I also think about it even when I'm awake. And it scares me, the feelings get mixed up. Thinking about leaving my family and friends forever is something I'm not ready to do yet, not this time. I haven't done so much about my life yet, I have my dreams, aspirations and I feel like I haven't lived my life to the fullest :)


Before I die, I have a to-do list and this is not in order:
1. a world tour (ok, I am faaaar from a celebrity or a singer who goes on tour, but I do want to do this before I leave the planet)
2. a job after I graduate ( and become successful in it, of course)
3. to become a lawyer? I've always wanted to become one but.... :)
4. I have to become rich first before I get to have number 1 on my list
5. I badly want to have a car, my own car
6. a house? a home :)
7. to give my parents back what they deserve to have ( this should go 1st, I believe)
8. help the family
9. a boyfriend? errr.. lol
10. marry (uhh? :D)
11. get myself a good camera
12. say sorry to everyone whom I've hurt and make peace with them
13. thank everyone whom I've met along the way who helped me become who I am
14. ........


These are the only things that I can think of at the moment, but I know I can make the list go longer because I still want to do a lot of things before I die.


And I am still a virgin, you know what that means. (laugh, laugh, laugh)


Classes begin tomorrow, and I might be a little busy for the next six weeks but I'll still try to update you, blog,


Live your Life! :D
Enjoy the week!