Past midnight sonata

Mustered more than enough courage to write about you. I'm pretty sure you know who you are. But really, do you? Because I put some thought about it but I couldn't get a grasp of your name. What about it? Read on if you care.
It was when I knew, we knew, that our friendship cannot get any further than how we once wanted it to be. Yes, at some point in our lives we hoped for something more.
You.
You are my best guy friend. The one who confessed to me on a night out with our friends. You were drunk. We were all laughing at you. Morning came and a text message from you said that everything you said from last night was real and not a bit of guilt and regret were to be felt. And, yes, that your lover got mad at you for going home early~in the morning.
You are that person who I met one night while I was out drinking with my friends, confident enough to walk to our table and ask for our names. Friendship was built from weeks and months of crazy late-night and early-morn phone calls, nights and nights of going out until our body clocks got fucked up. You saw my crazy side, the one I wouldn't want to go back to.
You are that person who lent me books to read rather than letting me sleep alone at some random place which was once too familiar. The one who randomly gave me apples to munch. At some time became the last person I had to see at night and the first one in the morning, never wanting to get out of bed. The one who once prepared breakfast for me while I sat on a chair, sipping my morning drink, staring at some chopsticks you own.
It's just funny how all these memories of you come at past midnight. Colorful memories of how you said you'd still choose me over your lover but never had the chance to prove it because you were too weak, because you thought I'll never be proud of you when I've always been since day one, because you thought you'll never be enough for me, and because you'll always be a brother and a best friend which for me is more than enough.
How we'd wander around the city with it's beautiful and bright lights. How you'd drive me home in the morning after hours of having weird conversations and awkward moments of silence, how our lips would meet to say goodbye.
How you'd send me random 'I miss you' text messages at past midnight. How your lips landed on mine under a beautiful night sky while we were staring at the moon as it was slightly being covered by the earth's shadow. How you'd kiss my hand, my cheeks, and my forehead while trying to get to sleep. How our eyes would meet through the darkness of the room.
How you left a mark in my life.
How everything happened during the most vulnerable days of my life.
How everything never really happened.
How music just selfishly eats up my ever hungry soul which peacefully wanders
at past midnight.